It was Rosh Hashanah 2009. As I stood next to a stream in my temporary home of Santa Fe, NM participating in a tashlich ritual (clearing ritual for the Jewish New Year) the spiritual leader said, “What is keeping you from shining the light of your neshema (soul)?” I knew at that moment that after a four year “marriage sabbatical” where I maintained a second home in the hopes of trying to save my marriage of 33 years, I had come to the breaking point. I needed to ask for a divorce. Oy.
Alone for the first time in my life, a new kind of journey began – an inner journey. What was it that I was here to contribute to the world? Why couldn’t I do that in partnership as many can? That is a whole story in itself. For me, I understood I had a calling I had been ignoring which required I go on the next part of my life’s journey alone.
The ensuing years were the most difficult of my life as I delved into what was holding me back from being all I could be – without blame or shame of anyone else. This required trust, courage and commitment to dig deep. For eight years I did my best to stay true to my own inner guidance rather than unconsciously following than that of my culture, family, or ancestry. I did my best to take responsibility for myself. I did my best to listen to and honor the ancestral wisdom I love and build upon it to form a foundation for my life that feeds my soul so I can help others do the same.
I wish there was a quick fix for revealing the light of the soul. I am pretty sure, however, this is a life-long journey. Life continues to offer us opportunities to peel away layer of confusion that steer us off course, even when a lot of life is going well.
You’ve likely heard, “life is a journey”, so we might as well enjoy the ride. Here are a few things that help me continue to learn, grow and feel at peace as best as possible in our rapidly changing world.
- Interacting with the Hebrew Letter Mandalas I created as they bring a joyful and healing energy into the world.
- Doing self-healing sessions and facilitating others with The Dalian Method that helps me clear unconscious patterns like nothing else I have ever tried.
- Connecting with people in meaningful conversations,
- Doing service.
- Creating sacred space to enjoy prayer, meditation, and creative expression (a little dance, artwork, or singing anyone?)
What is keeping you from shining your neshema, your soul’s light? What helps you to access your own wisdom and creativity?
I invite you to share your journey here. I look forward to learning from you and enjoying the ride towards a life of celebration and spiritual resilience together!